Destination: Anywhere by Susan Polyot Destination weddings have become increasingly popular in recent years, marketed as a combined wedding and honeymoon with one-stop convenience and a beautiful location all rolled into one package. As with many products in the bridal industry, they are often marketed as a "paradise" wedding to first time brides, a perfect beginning to a perfect life. As an encore bride you know that may not quite be the case. But, can a destination wedding be a good option for an encore bride? Absolutely. Destination weddings can offer an encore bride a number of great options. Who gets to go Encore brides often worry about who should (and shouldn't) comprise the guest list. Planning a destination wedding can ease that worry. A destination wedding can include just the two of you, and either one or two close friends and family, or no one. Most places that offer destination weddings also provide witnesses for the ceremony, if needed. More decisions made easy If you are planning a honeymoon, getting married at your honeymoon site offers a one stop planning option. You deal with one person, one place, and one source for all of your planning. A great option if you don't have a lot of time to devote to planning. Encore couples often feel conflicted about what their wedding should be: Small or large, what venue, and how many guests. A destination wedding can answer many of those questions. By traveling to a far off locale, you are deciding that your wedding will likely be a small intimate affair. You eliminate questions like do we invite Aunt Millie to another wedding, do we include office mates, and other questions related to the planning. The term destination wedding often conjures up tropical locations, beach front weddings with an ocean backdrop. While that can be the case, a destination wedding can include anyplace you and your groom would like it to. Maybe the idea of a ski vacation honeymoon really appeals to you. A destination wedding can be at a mountainside chapel just as easily as at an Oceanside resort. Or maybe you have always dreamed of a Paris honeymoon. Most places you can think of will help you plan your wedding, and often provide a few extras such as champagne and a small cake, and often a room upgrade. What you need to do There are some things to consider when planning a destination wedding. First, make sure you know what documentation you will need from your home state, and from the destination. Usually this is not cumbersome, but can be a major hassle if you do not have the required documentation upon arrival at the destination. You may have to arrive a day or two early to get the necessary papers in place, especially in foreign countries. Also, be sure to ask what travel documents you will need, such as a passport, in addition to wedding documents. If you are planning a cruise wedding, contact the cruise company directly. Always ask about fees. There may be government and administration fees of $500 or more, depending on the destination. Sometimes these are waived by the resort if you are staying seven nights or longer. Ask. If you are planning a honeymoon anyway, often the added fees for the ceremony offer significant cost savings over planning a more traditional wedding and reception, even for a small (50 people or less) celebration. Destination weddings are most often civil ceremonies, so if a religious ceremony is important to you, you may not opt for a destination option. A religious ceremony can be done, but may require a little more planning and research on your part. And be aware that getting married in a foreign location doesn't allow you to skip the religious requirements. A catholic wedding, for example still would require you to undergo pre-cana counseling, which can be done where you live. But, you would be required to show proof of this from your priest, and show proof of your previous marriage annulment. Pick a place that appeals to you and your groom. Make sure the place you are going offers the activities you want, and has the amenities you want. If children will be accompanying you, chose a resort, hotel or cruise that is not couples only. Many resorts that market destination weddings, especially in the Caribbean, are couples only, and children are absolutely not allowed. For tips on including you children in your honeymoon, see archives. Work with a travel agent. While many travel plans and wedding plans can be made via the internet, working with an experienced travel agent can be a big help in choosing the right location for your personal preferences. Travel agents often know the reputation of places you might be considering, or know of a great property that has everything you want, that you may not be aware of. Destination Etiquette What if you really want your best friend at your wedding in Barbados? Certainly you can invite others along for your trip. It is not an obligation for them to attend, however. You may think this is a great idea – a shared vacation with one or two other couples. Always let people know it is an option. It may not be how they choose to spend their vacation funds, or their vacation time. Saying no is not a slight to you; it is simply a choice for them. Be careful about putting too much pressure on friends to attend, friendships shouldn't be strained because someone doesn't opt to spend a significant amount of money on a vacation they didn't choose. If it is very important to you to have someone special there, either offer to pay for at least a portion of their expense, or opt for something other than a destination wedding. Pack your bags and have a great time! Return to Home Page |
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